December 2011
10 posts
I give up. You win, whoever you may be.
I’m tired of fighting a never ending battle over something I can’t control. I’m tired of not even knowing why I’m fighting. I’m tired of feeling like I’m a bother to everyone. A leech. Someone who does nothing but slowly drain the life and energy out. No one will admit that I’m doing it, but I can feel it…
...
Dear Voices, Please Shut Up...
I tear my heart open, I sew myself shut My weakness is that I care too much And my scars remind me that the past is real I tear my heart open just to feel
I don’t know what’s worth fighting for Or why I have to scream. I don’t know why I instigate And say what I don’t mean. I don’t know how I got this way I know it’s not alright. So I’m breaking...
Fast Service Needed in Cleaning Supplies
Dear Dick-head Customers,
First of all, let me point out that I do indeed realize that you are the guest in my store, and that I am technically here to serve your (nearly) every whim, as per store rules and such.
However, that being said, I am not your slave. And just because I may be DOING what it is you want, it by no means should be assumed that I am not wishing you a fast trip to hell....
How dare you. How dare you be jealous. How dare you say I’m leaving you. You have no fucking idea. I have told you for years now that I want a friend. Several, preferably, but if I have to start with one, so be it. So I manage to find one. One who is decent, and actually talks to me, and [gasp] will accept me for who I am, not what anyone wants me to be. For once I don’t feel like an...
When I was young, I used to dream of being someone. Preferably a hero, a warrior with battle scars and medals. I didn’t want it for the fame, but rather for the pride of knowing I had done something important. I would then be worth something.
As I got older, I lost some of the heroic aspirations. I no longer wanted recognition. I wanted quiet satisfaction that I had done well and helped...
red
bright red
slowly trickles down
so pretty
they say doing this will kill you
but i’ve never felt more alive
i can see it
i can finally feel
why can’t it always be like this
dark
getting hard to see
can’t move
such a pretty red
maybe there’s too much
is this what it feels like to die?
i feel.. so.. ali….
Kill me now
But do it slowly
I want to feel
I want to bleed
Torture me
Like I have my friends
I won’t scream
I won’t cry
Rip my heart out
It’s what I deserve
I know you want to
I know you should
Kill me now
But do it slowly
I am Phoenix
I am corrupted
Kill me now
So I can rise pure
I can’t be saved
I can’t be pardoned
Kill me now
But do it slowly
I'm not crazy, I'm just a little unwell...
I really want this depression to go away. It has no reason to be here, and it’s getting really annoying. I thought it was bad when it was just extreme apathy and no desire to do anything at all. But now there’s a little voice in me head that must inform me at random of different ways I could off myself. I want it to shut the fuck up and go away. I don’t want to be dead.
However,...
